By Jenn Harkness
It is hard to believe she has been gone for two years. The pandemic was just starting when we got the news. Even though I had graduated the Naropa Art Therapy program ten years earlier, when she won professor of the year, I had just been speaking with her about her work in Cambodia. We vented about whiteness and the importance of “cultural humility”, she sent resources for an article I was working on about sex trafficking in Southeast Asia.
We spoke a bit about our lives and her grief with her son Jayce. She was modeling through her art and vulnerably sharing online what heartbreak looks like. She was showing us resilience in the face of the impossible. Like so many, I had no idea it would be our last exchange. I was living on my sailboat at the time and she said,
“I so love seeing how you are living your dream.”
Generous. As always.
There are thousands of stories like this rippling out from Sue’s life. There have been so many people impacted by her heart, wisdom, and wicked smart brain. It’s not an exaggeration to think in extremely large numbers when you think of the all the people she taught, mentored, and worked with followed by all the folks they have taught, mentored, and worked with. Like one of her great mentors, Bernie Marek before her, and his mentors before him, her students are walking an interconnected legacy of creative exploration.
Her memorials were testimony to this. Talking with so many after her death, it was apparent how meaningful she was in their lives. She taught attachment theory, and embodied it as the “good enough mother” figure for students. For some this was nourishing, supportive, and caring; for some this was unsettling, infuriating, and challenging. I saw her engage whatever arose with folks with great presence and skill. Even when she was imperfect or messy, she worked with it. Regardless of the response folks had to her relational teaching style, she had a way of creatively bringing up the shit so we could all learn and grow from it.
I am still growing from it. My clients grow from it, even though most will never know her name. I was going to try to add resources here on articles she wrote, conferences she presented at, books she was part of, art and videos she made. There are too many. She was prolific. I have no doubt they will continue to be sited and influence further work in the field of Transpersonal Psychology and Art Therapy.
I do want to share this short video post, Life Goes On, when she was experimenting with expressing through film making. I have watched this video off and on since she left us as a way to connect with her and the wisdom she held in how to grieve people we love. I hope it is a comfort to you too. I miss her voice and southern drawl, especially when she got righteously sassy and swore.
It’s been a hard two years for all of us with the pandemic, and we will be sorting out the impact for many years to come. Especially for those of us working in the counseling field. Burn out is high, and we have carried too much. I know for me, it has been hard to grieve Sue from far away while also coping through the current shit show of our times. I think for many of us we are finally ready to come together and make art for Sue and finalize her art memorial. It is time to arrange them in the place where many of us met her, Naropa, and have the art do what she taught us it does in so many ways…
Please subscribe and keep in touch. Nancy Wolff will be announcing gatherings and information soon for Sue’s Naropa Art Memorial. May we all connect with Sue’s creative, playful, fierce, wise and loving example to cultivate peace and justice in the world.
Love for Sue 